Kara (Starkis Family #4) Read online

  I walked around him, admiring his erection as I teased him by licking my lips. I’d been an inexperienced girl the last time we were together. I couldn’t wait to show him that I’d evolved into a self-assured woman who knew how to please her man.

  I lay on the white duvet, stretching my arms over my head as I looked at him with heavy eyes. I was already drunk on lust but still thirsty for a taste of him. I ran my foot up and down the bed, watching his eyes track my slow, methodical movements. He was trying to drag it out, to torture me, but two could play that game. My hands crept down my body, over my ribs, down my thighs, until his sharp intake of breath made me smile.

  “You think it’s fun to tease me?” he asked, his voice a hoarse murmur. “Maybe it’s time to give you a taste of your own medicine.”

  Mmmm. Yes, please.

  He hooked my legs over his shoulders, lifting my bottom while he positioned his broad, tanned shoulders between my thighs. I was officially in heaven, caught between the thrill of anticipation and the ecstasy of action.

  He flicked his tongue over my core, and I would have propelled straight off the bed had he not been holding me prisoner. As it was, I was his to do with as he wanted, and I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

  My cries were raw, inflamed with the heat coursing through my body. I gripped the pillows on either side of my head as he methodically used that skillful tongue to steal my sanity. I felt as if I were hurtling through a cyclone, knowing the landing would be hard and fast and volatile, forever changing my world.

  It was too much. It wasn’t enough. I wanted more. I couldn’t take any more.

  My eyes closed, my fists clenched, my body tensed, and I was on the edge, ready to freefall. “Now!”

  He licked me slowly, coaxing me up then down with gentle intent, before taking me in his arms.

  I was in love. Not just with the way he made me feel, though that was reason enough. I was in love with the man.

  “I’ll never get enough of you,” he said, his lips against mine. “Think you can handle that?”

  I raised my hips while thrusting my hands into his hair. I kissed him greedily, showing him he wasn’t the only one who was insatiable. One earth-shattering orgasm wasn’t enough. I wanted more. “Question is, can you handle me?”

  He groaned before reaching into the nightstand for a condom.

  I eyed the box, raising an eyebrow. “You sure they haven’t expired?” she asked, looking at the unopened box.

  He laughed before tearing the box open and fisting a foil packet. “I’m sure.”

  I held out my hand, wanting to do the honors. He looked so incredible I was torn between rolling on the condom and taking him in my mouth. But we had all night, all weekend, in fact. There would be plenty of time for me to make him plead for more. My eyes followed my actions as I slowly rolled on the condom, and I smiled when his breath hissed through his lips.

  “Anxious?” I asked, gliding my tongue over my lower lip.

  “You have no idea.” He gripped my hips, suspending his body above mine. “I know I don’t have to ask if you’re ready for me.”

  “If you make me wait another second, I may have to take matters into my own hands,” I teased.

  “Like hell,” he muttered, grabbing my wrists and raising them above my head. “Just to make sure I’ll be the only one touching you tonight.” He inched his hard shaft inside me slowly, reminding me with every nudge that every man who’d preceded him had been a poor substitute. He was the real deal, the answer to every question I’d ever had about who I belonged with.

  His grasp on my wrists was as fierce as the hard thrusts driving the vintage iron headboard into the drywall. He wasn’t making love to me. He was dominating and controlling me, and I’d never wanted to be possessed more.

  Dustin opened his mouth, mouthing “mine,” and I tightened my grip, claiming him without words.

  His eyes traveled over my body, watching my breasts bounce with each powerful thrust, before he pinched the taut peaks hard enough to make me cry out.

  “You like that?” he whispered in my ear.

  “I love what you do to me.”

  He groaned, burying his face in my neck. “You know I don’t intend to let you leave this bed all weekend, right?”

  My breathing became more labored as my body tightened around him. “Why would I want to go anywhere?”

  “We have a lot of catching up to do, you and me.”

  “Yes.” I didn’t know how he could talk when I could barely think.

  “This is where I need to be, right here, buried deep inside you.”

  I shivered, my heart battering my chest, as his thrusts became more concentrated, clearly trying to coax another orgasm from me. “God, I forgot how good it was.”

  “I intend to make sure you never forget again.” He leaned back, watching me as he trailed his hand down my body.

  When his hand reached the apex of my thighs, I held my breath, silently begging him to finish me off. I didn’t know how he could seem so contained, so in control, when the tremors moving through my body were nothing short of electrifying. He finally gave in, circling his thumb around my tight nub until I was clawing at his thighs, screaming his name, while I felt as though my entire body convulsed.

  “God, that was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen, baby.”

  I could tell by the tense set of his jaw and the way he threaded his hands through mine, gripping tightly as he thrust deep, that he wasn’t far behind me.

  “Let go,” I whispered.

  “Jesus…” He jerked as I felt and witnessed the power of his release, wishing I could experience it unrestricted.

  When he finally collapsed on me, I kissed his cheek while running my hands over his damp back. “That was amazing.”

  “That was just the beginning, sexy.”

  Chapter Eleven

  Dustin

  It had been years since I’d felt this content. Eight to be exact.

  I caught her leg between both of mine, effectively trapping her. I didn’t want this weekend to end. I knew when it did, she would have to return to the city and her real life, and I didn’t know what that meant for us.

  “I love this,” I said, massaging her scalp as I closed my eyes and let my mind treat me to an instant replay of what I’d just experienced. “Being with you like this feels so right, baby. Always has.”

  She inhaled deeply before kissing my chest. “I feel the same way.”

  I knew we should think about getting up soon. I’d promised her an amazing dinner, and I didn’t want to disappoint her, but before I hauled myself out of bed, I needed to know what she was thinking. God, I sounded like a goddamn girl, wanting to analyze thoughts and feelings after sex.

  Rolling onto my side, I smiled when I saw her eyes were still closed. “Tell me what you’re thinking, beautiful.”

  “That I could stay here, just like this, for the rest of the weekend.”

  I wouldn’t have minded that at all. “I promised to feed you,” I said, slipping my hand under the sheet. I ran my hand down her arm before curling it around her hip so I could draw her even closer. “Shouldn’t we think about getting out of bed soon?”

  “Mmm, soon.” She wrapped her arms around my waist.

  She looked so peaceful, so content, I was almost afraid to break the spell, but I had to know. “So we said a lot of things in the heat of the moment…”

  Kara tipped her head back, opening her eyes. “I meant everything I said. You?”

  “Definitely.” I crushed her against my chest, wrapping my arms tightly around her. “I guess I was just wondering where we go from here.”

  “Good question.”

  “Well, I have to travel back to North Carolina a couple of times a month. I have a few projects I need to check on. Kevin will—”

  “Kevin.” She grimaced. “Please tell me you’re not talking about Kevin Hansen.”

  “Yeah. Why?”

  She rolled onto her back and stared
at the ceiling as she pulled the sheet higher. “I guess I never thought about having to face your friends again until you mentioned him. They must hate me.”

  I thought about my conversation with my friends at the bar and the lengths Kevin had gone to try to catch Kara in a lie. “I make my own decisions. What they think about us doesn’t matter to me.”

  “Are you sure about that?” she asked, peeking at me out of the corner of her eye. “They’ll probably try to talk you out of pursuing a relationship with me, you know. They’ll remind me that I broke your heart once and if you let your guard down, I could do it again.”

  “They’ve already said that, and I’m still here, right where I want to be.” I brought her hand to my lips. “Nothing anyone says is going to change the way I feel about you.” I could tell she wasn’t sure whether to believe me. Only time would put her fears to rest.

  “We can’t just pick up where we left off,” she said, rolling onto her side to face me. “We have to get to know each other all over again. I was a kid when I fell in love with you. You were my world. Things are… different now. I’m different.”

  I knew it wasn’t realistic to hope that her world would ever revolve around me again. She was right—things were different. We both had demanding careers in different cities, friends, and family obligations.

  “Tell me about all the ways you’ve changed,” I said, running an index finger down her nose. I knew she thought I was being playful, but I wasn’t. I wanted to know everything about the older, wiser Kara.

  She pursed her lips. “Well, I have to work a lot harder to maintain my weight now. I can’t eat anything I want anymore, which means no more cherry cheesecake ice cream for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.” She laughed and slapped my chest when I rolled my eyes.

  “What else?” I was preparing for the worst but expecting the best. Nothing she could say would scare me away. I was already in too deep.

  “I don’t like to sleep in anymore. I’m usually up by six thirty, even on weekends.”

  “Ugh.” I rolled over, covering my eyes with my forearm. “That’s it. That one’s a deal breaker for me.”

  She ran her long nails across my ribs, making me jump. “Ah, still ticklish, I see.” She grinned. “Nice to see some things don’t change.”

  I grabbed her hand and fastened it against my chest. “We were talking about you. What other bad habits have you picked up, aside from healthy eating and waking up too early?”

  “Let’s see,” she said, propping her head in her free hand. “Oh, I know. I play pool.”

  “You what?” I asked, trying to hide my disbelief.

  “You know, pool. As in billiards.”

  “Yeah, I know what you mean, but I don’t believe it. If you recall, I took you to a pool hall once, and you couldn’t sink a single ball.”

  “I did too,” she said, sounding indignant.

  “Yeah, the eight ball. So when did you become such a pool shark?”

  “When I went back to school. I made up my mind that I was going to start doing all kinds of things I hadn’t done before. I guess I just wanted to reinvent myself.”

  I knew her change in attitude had had something to do with our breakup. I’d started engaging in a lot of uncharacteristic behavior too. Anything to block out the pain.

  “Let’s see, what else do you need to know about me? Don’t call me when there’s a game on. I won’t answer.”

  “A game?” I asked, trying to hide my amusement. The Kara I knew didn’t like sports, watching or participating. But then, she didn’t fish or play pool either. “What kind of game, just so I know.”

  “Football, oh and—”

  “Football?” I’d had Panthers season tickets for the past five years and rarely missed a game. “Okay, that’s it. I’m in love. When’s the wedding?” My smile slipped when she looked more horrified than amused.

  She sat up quickly. “You know, I am getting kind of hungry. Why don’t you fire up the grill while I—”

  “Hey,” I said, grabbing her arm, “I was joking.” I hesitated, knowing full well I could be going too far. “But there may come a time when I won’t be. If we’re going to start this thing up again, I need to know that I won’t get shot down if that day comes.”

  She looked at me over her shoulder. “I’m crazy about you, Dustin.”

  “But?”

  “We have a long, long way to go before we start thinking about forever.”

  “Maybe you didn’t take me seriously earlier,” I said, trying to tamp down my annoyance. “When I said I wasn’t interested in making love to you again unless I knew you were mine, I meant it.”

  “If you’re asking me whether I plan to date other men, the answer is no.”

  “You sure as hell better not be!” I took a deep breath as I watched her slip into her clothes.

  “But I won’t allow you to dictate how my life should unfold. We need to slow down, get to know each other again.”

  I jumped up before she could bolt because I knew that was exactly what she had planned. “So far, you’ve told me a bunch of insignificant shit that doesn’t change a thing.” I gripped her upper arms so she couldn’t flee and pointed at her chest. “In here, you’re still the same girl I fell in love with.”

  “Am I?” She licked her lips before lowering her gaze. “I don’t feel like the same person, and I don’t think you are either. How can we be? So much has happened.”

  I let my hands hit my thighs. “What the hell is this? Why are you having second thoughts now?”

  “Who said I am?” She ran a hand through her tousled hair. “I just need a breather.”

  “A breather?” I asked, feeling panic rising. “I’m not giving you a breather. I just got you back!”

  “I just need to go next door and unpack my things, maybe grab a shower. I’ll be back.”

  I grabbed her hand when she turned away. “Are you sure about that?”

  “Of course.”

  I didn’t know if I’d ever get over the fear that engulfed me every time I watched her walk away.

  ***

  True to her word, she returned a couple of hours later with a bottle of chardonnay in hand. “I thought this would work with dinner.”

  “Perfect. Thanks.” I took the chilled bottle, knowing I had to say something about my outburst earlier. “I’m, uh, sorry if I pushed too hard. This isn’t easy.”

  “No, it isn’t.” She sat on a lounger, watching me turn the chicken on the grill. “It’s not like we’re just getting to know each other. We have all this history to sort through, all this hurt and anger and disappointment. There will be fights. There will be frustration.” She smiled, but her eyes remained impassive. “I’m sure there will be tears and name-calling and even more regrets. I guess the question is, can we handle that?”

  “I can if you can.” The picture she’d just painted didn’t scare me, but losing her did. I could handle a tumultuous relationship if it meant spending the rest of my life with my soul mate. I honestly didn’t expect happily ever after. I expected reality—happiness punctuated with brief periods of anger and sadness followed by great makeup sex. I expected the woman I loved to always have my back, just as I would always have hers.

  I closed the lid on the grill, walked toward her, and crouching, took her hands. “I don’t do easy, Kara. Never have, never will. I know I could find a sweet, smart, beautiful woman that I have no history with. Been there, done that. It’s easy to pretend you’re in love when there’s no bitterness from the past making you doubt what the hell you’re doing in this relationship.”

  “Yeah,” she said, lowering her head. “I know what you mean.”

  “But would you rather live the rest of your life in that gray area? Not really happy but not sad? That’s not what I want.”

  “It’s not what I want either.” She looked at our joined hands.

  “When I was with you, it was passionate and intense and scary as hell. But I felt more alive than I ever have before.
”

  “Me too.”

  “So isn’t it worth it to take a risk so we can feel that way again?” I would risk anything to recapture that feeling. “I’m so tired of going through the motions, pretending I’m okay when I’m not. I’ve never been into mundane conversations and pleasant evenings with stuffy people who don’t impress me.”

  “I know.” She squeezed my hands as we shared a knowing look, remembering all the events our parents had subjected us to over the years. “Half the time we’d sneak away from parties like that and end up in the backseat of your car.”

  I grinned. “And I wouldn’t have traded those moments for anything.”

  “We had some incredible times, didn’t we?”

  “The best of my life.” I’d been around the world, seen some of the most breathtaking natural wonders and manmade sites, but none of that compared to the moments I’d spent with her, making love, daydreaming, and planning our future.

  “Mine too, Dustin.” She brushed her palm against my jaw. “I’m sorry I freaked out earlier. You have to know how much I want this. I’m just trying to balance that against the—”

  “Dread of knowing it could all be snatched away again.”

  “Exactly.”

  I understood her in a way only I could because we’d both been down this road together. I finally believed that when she’d left me, when I sent her away, it had been as painful for her as it had been for me. I kissed her hands before walking over and turning off the grill.

  “Dinner’s ready?” she asked.

  “Yeah, but I want to do something first.” Night had fallen, and it felt as if we were all alone. A few lights shone in distant houses but nothing that would have led me to believe anyone cared what we might be up to.

  “What’s that?” She laughed as I pulled her to her feet. “You have this look in your eye, and it makes me think I should be worried.”

  She was wearing a strapless cotton dress, but she’d put on a bikini underneath, perhaps assuming I’d be interested in a midnight dip in the ocean. I peeled the dress down slowly, and she tracked my movements while resting her hands on my shoulders.