Going For It (Texas Titans #7) Page 9

  “You’re a sweet girl,” Dalton said, rubbing her shoulders. “Sometimes I think you’re too sweet for your own good. I get why you’d be cautious, especially with someone like Blaise.”

  “Thanks.” She reached for a grape from the fruit platter her assistant had brought in for them. “I’m already in so deep. I wish I wasn’t, but I am. It would hurt like hell to walk away from him now.”

  “You’re in love with him?”

  “Yeah.” She wanted to say she wasn’t sure, but her heart knew the truth. She was all in, and it was pointless to pretend otherwise.

  “Then you have to ask yourself if you can leave. I mean, is it even possible?”

  “It’s always possible.”

  He smoothed a hand over his red silk tie. “I don’t know about that, sweetheart. Sometimes, someone gets under your skin and you can’t get them out. You know the relationship is toxic, or at the very least not what you want it to be, but you can’t end it. Not even to save yourself.”

  Kiara was shocked to hear that from Dalton, of all people. To her knowledge, he’d never been emotionally invested in a relationship in his life. “Sophie?” she asked, referring to the girl Dalton had been dating for the past several months.

  He chuckled. “Oh no, you’re not gonna turn this around on me. We’re talking about you and your problems, not mine.”

  She wanted to probe, but she knew Dalton would share when and if he was ready. “Fine, oh wise one,” she said, smirking. “Tell me what you think I should do about Blaise.”

  “All the things you mentioned—trust, honesty, fidelity—those are deal breakers in a relationship, no doubt about it. So let me ask you this. Could you see Thomas cheating on you?”

  She’d been down that road before when she placed her trust in a man who swore he was being faithful when he wasn’t. He thought being a professional athlete gave him special privileges. It occurred to her that she’d never thought to ask Blaise if he’d ever cheated on a girlfriend. He said he’d never slept with another man’s wife before Marla, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t cheated. “No, I don’t think he would.”

  “So it’s the trust and honesty you’re struggling with?”

  “Yeah.” She popped another grape in her mouth, needing something to distract her.

  “Everyone tells a little white lie from time to time. That’s part of being human, I think.”

  “I guess you’re right.” How many times had she begged off an important event by claiming she wasn’t feeling well when she was just tired, or told her parents she had to work and couldn’t fly home for the weekend when she had a spa appointment she didn’t want to miss? She certainly wasn’t a saint. Maybe it was unfair of her to expect Blaise to be. “It’s not that he lied to me. He just didn’t tell me things he should have.”

  “Were they things you had a right to know, things that impacted you directly?”

  She considered the impact her affiliation with Morin could have on her career if what Blaise claimed was accurate. “I think so.”

  Dalton must have sensed her hesitancy because he said, “See, I think we’re all entitled to a past. When a woman asks me how many girls I’ve slept with, you really think I’m going to tell her?”

  “Not if you’re smart,” Kiara said, amused by Dalton’s self-deprecating comment.

  “Exactly.” He pointed at her. “But it’s not for the reasons you think. I’m not ashamed of anything I’ve done. I’ve lived a great life, had a hell of a good time, but that doesn’t mean I want to share that with the woman I love.”

  Kiara sucked in a breath, unable to hide her shock. Was Dalton implying that he was in love with Sophie?

  “Just like I wouldn’t want to hear about other guys she’s been with. Some things just fall under the headline of too much information, and I tend to think previous lovers is one of those things.”

  “You might be right.” Part of Kiara wished she’d never even heard Marla’s name.

  “Trust is something you develop over time, hon.”

  “You have to look at the guy Blaise is today, not who he was a year ago,” Dalton said. “You have to ask yourself if you have faith in him. If he says he’s out with the boys, can you trust that he is?”

  “Yes,” she said, without hesitation.

  “And he’s not getting other girls’ phone numbers or going home with them?”

  Given her previous experiences, she couldn’t answer unequivocally, but her gut told her he would be faithful to her. “No, I don’t think so.”

  “Okay, let me ask you this.”

  Kiara’s lips twitched. When she’d decided to unload on Dalton, she had no idea he’d take his role as her advisor so seriously. “What?”

  “You’re having a lousy day and need to vent, or you’re having a great day and want to celebrate. Who do you call?”

  Since Sabrina had Dylan, her answer came easily. “Blaise.”

  “I think you have your answer.”

  ***

  Blaise beat the hell out of his kid brother in the ring. Damn, it felt good.

  “Okay, okay,” Rowan said, holding up his hands. “I’m done.”

  Blaise smirked, pulling his gloves off before taking out his mouth guard. “That was solid, man. Seriously, you’ve got natural skill.” His brother could have gone all the way back when they were kids, had he not gotten side-tracked.

  “That means a lot coming from you.” Rowan reached for a towel to wipe the sweat from his face. “So you think you can work with me?”

  “As long as you’re serious about this. I’m not interested in wasting my time.”

  “I am serious.”

  “Good.” Blaise wiped the sweat from his face and chest before reaching for a water bottle. He caught a glimpse of Kiara working out with her trainer. He’d been working with his brother when she walked in, so they hadn’t had a chance to talk.

  “Jesus, she’s hot,” Rowan said, following Blaise’s gaze to Kiara.

  “Don’t even think about it. She’s mine.” Blaise knew he may be overstating things. It had been a day and a half since their argument in her car, and she hadn’t tried to contact him.

  “Oh, yeah.” Rowan poured water on himself to cool off. “That’s the chick in the picture on your desk, isn’t it?”

  Blaise frowned at his brother’s choice of words. “That’s her.”

  “Looks like she’s on her way out,” Rowan said, pointing at Kiara’s retreating back. “Aren’t you gonna try to catch up with her?”

  “We kind of got into it yesterday.” Blaise turned away from the exit she was passing through. “I’m trying to give her some space.”

  “Are you crazy?” Rowan laughed. “You give a girl like that too much space, and another dude’s gonna move in and take your place.”

  That was exactly what Blaise was afraid of. “Let’s hit the shower. You wanna come back to my place for a pizza?” He didn’t feel like going home to an empty house, where Kiara’s scent still seemed to linger.

  “Sure.”

  “I just want to talk to Max. I’ll catch up with you in a bit.”

  “Sounds good.” Rowan tossed the towel over his shoulder and headed toward the locker room.

  Max grinned as Blaise approached. “Hey, boss man. Did you and little missus get into it?”

  “Why?” Blaise asked, tensing. “Did she say anything to you about me?”

  “No, but she couldn’t take her eyes off you. Made it kind of tough to train her.”

  Blaise hoped that meant she would be ready to talk soon. He couldn’t stand the silent treatment much longer. He had to know what she was thinking, how she felt, before he went crazy. “Do you know where she was headed?”

  “Said she was meeting a friend for a drink.”

  “Male or female?” Blaise asked, clenching his towel.

  “Uh…” Max paused, obviously trying to recall exactly what she’d said. “Him, she definitely said him.”

  “Son of a—”


  “She hasn’t left yet.” Max hooked a thumb toward the locker room. “Why don’t you go talk to her before she leaves?”

  Blaise was desperate to talk to her, but pushing her before she was ready would only make matters worse. “I think I’ll let her come to me when she’s ready.”

  “I know you didn’t ask for my opinion,” Max said, stacking the weights they’d used during their session, “but if she’s going out with another guy tonight, you may not have time on your side.”

  Chapter Nine

  Blaise hated that he was so preoccupied during his first chance to catch up with his brother in years.

  “You thinkin’ about the fight with your girl?” Rowan asked, stacking his hands behind his head as he stretched his feet out on the ottoman in front of him.

  “She’s out with some other guy,” Blaise said, bitterness seeping into every word. “A friend. At least that’s what she told her trainer.”

  “But you think he might be more?”

  “I screwed up with her.” Blaise sighed. “Things were going great, and I managed to screw everything up.”

  “What happened?” Rowan asked, reaching for his can of soda.

  “Let’s just say I wasn’t exactly forthcoming about my past. There were things she had a right to know, and I didn’t tell her.”

  “Why not?”

  “I was afraid.”

  Rowan chuckled. “You? Afraid? Man, I’ve never known you to be afraid of anything. Ever.”

  His brother was right. If the people who knew Blaise best had to find one word to describe him, it would probably be fearless. But Kiara was different. She inspired fear and insecurity in him, and he hated that. But he loved her. “I was afraid of losing her if I told her the truth.”

  “I spent a lot of years running from the truth,” Rowan said. “So I know a thing or two about that.”

  “What do you mean?”

  They shared a pensive look before Rowan said, “Come on, Blaise. We grew up in the same house. We both know what it was like with those two.”

  Blaise tried not to think about his childhood, but when he did, he suppressed the bad memories. It could have been much worse. At least he hadn’t been beaten or abandoned. “Gotta get past all that, Row. You can’t hold on to the hate. It’ll eat you alive.”

  “I know, but you can’t pretend it didn’t happen either. Isn’t that what you’ve been trying to do?”

  Blaise was grateful he was getting a chance to reconnect with his kid brother, but Rowan was awakening buried memories that made him squeamish. He didn’t want to go there. Not now. Maybe not ever. “I don’t run. I don’t hide. Can you say the same?”

  “I’m not running or hiding anymore. In fact, I had a heart-to-heart with the folks not long ago.”

  Blaise couldn’t hide his shock. “You did?”

  “Yeah, I told them what I thought of them for what they did when we were growing up. I told the old man I thought his approach sucked.” Rowan released a huff of laughter as he rolled his eyes. “He said he was trying to toughen us up by telling us we were pussies, that we were stupid and worthless. He said it must have worked, because look at how tough you are.”

  Blaise didn’t always feel tough. Sometimes he felt weak, scared, insecure, and emotionally inept, and he knew he had his parents to thank for that. They hadn’t given him or Rowan a solid foundation. They’d never made them feel safe or secure or loved. His parents never made him feel strong or worthy. Only boxing made Blaise feel strong. Beating his opponent into submission made him feel worthy. But he didn’t have the skills to handle this thing with Kiara. He was way out of his element.

  “You can’t let them win, Blaise.”

  “They haven’t won.” Blaise reached for his water. “I don’t believe the things they told me.”

  “Don’t you?” Rowan raised an eyebrow. “This girl you’re seeing, you think you’re worthy of her?”

  Only his flesh and blood, someone who’d walked the same path he had, could hone in on his insecurities so effortlessly. “I don’t know.”

  “You must not, or you’d be busting down her door right now, fighting for her, instead of sulking here with me because she doesn’t want you anymore.”

  Blaise’s gut twisted painfully. “She didn’t say she doesn’t want me anymore.”

  “But you’re assuming she doesn’t, ‘cause what would a classy woman like that want with a low-life like you, right?”

  There was that word again, that label that seemed to stick to him like glue.

  “You’re better than you think you are,” Rowan said, waiting for Blaise’s reaction. “You’ve earned the right to be proud of yourself. You’ve been a champion, the best in the world. You’ve probably earned a couple hundred million during your career. You’ve got the houses and the cars, and you earned respect the hard way.”

  Blaise swallowed, choked by emotion. It had been a long time since someone had told him he was worth anything, and seeing himself through his brother’s eyes made him believe it.

  “You think the dude who’s with her now is better for her?” Rowan asked. “You think he can love her more? You think he can give her something you can’t… in bed?”

  “Don’t even go there,” Blaise growled. “Not unless you want to get your ass handed to you again.”

  “You’re a tough guy inside the ring, but what happened to the tough guy I used to know outside the ring? Did that loss against Morin suck the spirit out of you, or what?”

  Blaise had been asking himself that very question for months.

  “You’re giving up, quitting on a relationship that obviously means everything to you. Why? Because you think you don’t deserve her? Because you think if you leave her alone, she’ll find someone better?”

  Blaise curled his hand into a fist. The thought of Kiara being with anyone else burned him up. He couldn’t handle it, couldn’t even let himself think about it.

  “Fight for her, Blaise. Don’t let her go. Don’t let someone else have her. If you love her, fight for her. Make her realize you’re the best man for her.”

  ***

  Kiara was stunned to hear Blaise’s voice over her intercom at midnight. He said he needed to see her, that he couldn’t wait until morning, so she was standing at her door in a black silk robe that left little to the imagination. She told herself it didn’t matter—he’d seen it all—but she knew it was more than that. She wanted to reconnect with him. It had only been a few days since they’d made love, and she missed him already.

  He stepped off her elevator looking ridiculously handsome in faded jeans, scarred motorcycle boots, and a leather jacket. His attire told her he’d ridden his Harley instead of taking his car. He stalked toward her, his eyes drifting to the cleavage peeking out through the gap in her robe.

  “Isn’t it raining?” she asked.

  “So?” he asked, rolling his shoulder.

  “So you can’t ride that bike in the rain.” She stepped back when his powerful body forced her inside.

  “Who says I can’t?”

  “I do.” She gripped his shoulders when his hands closed around her waist.

  “Does that mean you still care about me?” he whispered.

  The dampness clinging to his clothes made her shiver. “Of course I still care about you. What kind of question is that?”

  “You were out with another man tonight.” He pressed his face into her neck, inhaling deeply. “I can smell his cologne on you. Why the hell can I smell his goddamn cologne on you?” He kicked the door closed as he backed her into a wall in the small entrance.

  “We hugged,” she said, feeling breathless from his unexpected invasion. She’d never seen this side of him, so controlling, confident, and powerful. She imagined that’s how he must have been right before a fight. Fearless.

  “That’s it?” he asked, pulling on the tie of her bathrobe. “You just hugged?”

  “Yes.” She closed her eyes when he peeled off the silk, letting it flutter to
the ground. “He was just a friend. But how did you know I was out with—”

  “Max told me.” He kissed her deeply, possessively, hungrily. “I was trying to give you some space to figure things out.” He curled his hand around her breast. “When I realized that wasn’t working, I decided to change my strategy.”

  “Really?” She struggled to keep her eyes open as he fondled her, bringing her nipples to taut peaks. “What’s your new strategy?”

  “To prove to you that no one can make you feel the way I do.”

  He was right about that. She became someone else in his arms, exposed and vulnerable, yet so turned on. “I already know that. You have nothing to prove.”

  “I. Love. You.” He punctuated his words with hot, needy kisses that made her as desperate as he seemed to be. “A couple of months may be too soon to feel… so much, but I can’t help it.” His hands slid down her body, scraping her skin with his callused palms. “I can’t help the way I feel about you.”

  She saw the powerlessness in his eyes, and it made her want to soothe him, to take away his trepidation. “I can’t help the way I feel about you either.” She pushed his jacket off, letting it fall to the floor. “I’m not trying to fight it anymore.” She reached for the hem of his long-sleeved black T-shirt and pulled it over his head before tossing it on the floor. “I hate that you felt you had to keep things from me.”

  “I’m sorry, baby.” He kissed her neck, planting his leg between hers. “From now on, I’ll be completely honest with you. I swear. Just give me another chance.”

  She didn’t have a choice. After a sleepless night of replaying everything that had happened, including Dalton’s advice, she’d realized she wasn’t ready to let Blaise go. “If you lie to me or keep things from me again, all bets are off,” she warned, reaching for his belt buckle. “I need to be able to trust you, to count on you, if this relationship is going to work.”

  “You got it.” His knee was pinned to the wall, holding her in place as the soft denim abraded her.